Vance, Me, God and The Homeless. LONG Post..Sorry.

Disclaimer: all quotes in the following post are as accurate as I can recall.

Something's been bugging me all week that I've tried to write about but haven't been able to figure out how to say what I want to say. I still don't really know, so let's just see what happens.

On Monday, I found myself in the middle of a political themed discussion at work, which I try not to do, but sometimes it's unavoidable. I try not to judge people because they have different political opinions than I do, in fact I have some good friends and family who are on the other side of things than I am, and that's okay. I believe most conservatives are good folks, I just happen to whole-heartedly disagree on some issues. Usually, it's just the issues that get under people's skins, not the people, but sometimes you just have to wonder.

My co-worker, we'll call him Vance, was complaining about the current President as usual. That doesn't bother me so much, I complained for the last eight years so I guess it's someone else's turn. Besides, Obama's not perfect and to be honest I'm not 100% sure about all of his decisions myself. Anyway, Vance starts in on how he hates how the government is mandating that we all pay to help "professional mothers" on welfare and the homeless in the streets. A common complaint, but it didn't stop there.

Some of us pointed out that we felt those people should be getting help, not the welfare abusers mind you, but the people out on the streets. After all, we're all Americans and we look after our own. He then shot back by saying that it's not the American way to be required to help someone. The American way in his estimation is "if you are poor I can choose to help you, but I don't have to." Essentially, it's up to the individual to make it on their own and handouts are not guaranteed nor should they be. So far it's a classic ideological argument, right? Okay, here's where Vance went a step too far.

He said that if a person is out on the streets and draining the public funds we should just "let them die."

"Let them die?" I asked, to make sure he said it.

"Yes. I place no intrinsic value on human life." Nice talk from a Republican. Vance then said something to the effect of if you can't get with the program "take yourself out of the equation."

The conversation went on from there, with much more rational people trying to trap him with questions like "where do you draw the line" and comparing his ideas to China's killing and mutilating babies to control population, but I removed myself at that point. I had work to do, and Vance had already made my head hurt so I just threw up my hands and saved the arguing for a time when I might actually be able to talk some sense into someone.

You see, the thing that disturbed me about the whole thing is how serious he was. It would be one thing if the comments were a bad attempt at humor or ramblings of a drunk, but that's not what this was. A man gets a look in his eye when he's speaking his true beliefs, he's telling you what he feels in his heart of hearts (icy though it may be), and no amount of arguing is going to by-God change a thing. You can't fake that look, and you can't escape it either. Over time those ideals may change but in that moment he's right, you're wrong and anything you say or do will only prove it in his mind. There is no arguing at that point, so don't waste your breath.

I didn't.

But it still bothers me that a man can actually think that way. The sheer lack of empathy for fellow human beings just blows my mind. I mean, I've heard people say "Get a job ya bum" when encountering the homeless, and I understand the "make your own bed and lie in it" philosophy of life, but wishing death on people is just wrong. Morally, logically and theoretically wrong. How much hatred and arrogance can a person be filled with to feel so passionately about leaving others to die? This goes way beyond any political affiliation and gets into psychological instability. There are probably others who feel the same way but I've never met one before.

Then again, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. Most people think Vance is kind of a prick, and he'll be the first to say so (which in a weird way I kind of respect). However, in the past year or so I had begun to think that Vance wasn't necessarily a bad person, he just wasn't very good at the whole social aspect. He has had a few experiences that soured him, and I've tried to take that into account all along. Now though, I just don't know. In the end I'm not the judge, God is, but my opinion has been altered and it's a shame because I really have been making more of an effort to get along with Vance. So the rest of the week has been fairly normal and I've even joked with him a little, but it's been weird.

The other weird thing is that I didn't keep up the argument. I'm not usually one to back down, but there have been a few instances in the last year or so (not involving the same person) where I have chosen to step aside. I have turned the other cheek even though every fibre in my body was screaming to do the opposite. Obviously at work I've subdued myself so as to not endanger my job in this economy but there were other times I didn't have to back down but did anyway. Maybe it's because I'm a dad now. Maybe it's because I'm getting better at picking my battles. Maybe it's because I'm older and smarter...well, older. Or maybe, just maybe, God's working on me to help me be a better person. I haven't been seeking after God like I'm supposed to do, but sometimes when you're not reading the Bible and sleeping through church and your head is filled with other things, that's when you hear God the loudest. I guess even though I'm not always seeking after Him, He's always seeking me.

So it's been a weird week, but it's given me a lot to think about. Sorry this got so long and weirdly religious at the end, but I wrote this as a sort of catharsis and I do feel a little better having worked through it all. And, hey, at least you didn't have to read about Mr. Big again, right?